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Brown Daffy?

written by Pietro

(Opens on Daffy Duck sitting on his couch watching Looney Tunes on Cargoon Networm ( a spoof of "Cartoon Network"))

Daffy: Oh boy! This is great! I can't wait until they show one of my greatest cartoons ever - "Daffy's Southern Exposure."

(Late 60s Seven Arts titles appear.)

Daffy: Looks like another Cool Cat cartoon! Oh well! I hope it's "Injun Trouble!"

(The title card of the cartoon is seen "Daffy's Southern Exposure.")

Daffy: Not that anything but that! They're showing MY classic but, in it's dang redrawn, slop-artist,
good-for-nothing, colorized print!

(We see on the TV screen a brown Daffy jumping around crazy in the pond.)

Daffy: NO! NO! I forgot I'm brown in this one! Well enough is too much! I'm goin' over to Cargoon Networm and tell them to air the original version or my name isn't Donald Duck - which I'm glad it ain't!

(Daffy heads out the door to his car and checks his road map.)

Daffy: Okay, so Cargoon Networm is in Georgia. No problem! Thank you JBVO!

(Daffy gets in his car and heads out.)

Daffy: Just to let you folks know I did pass my ACME driving test.

(The next thing we know Daffy crashes into five cars.)

Daffy: Okay, so I didn't pass my driving test! So what?

(We fade into the next scene where we see Daffy backing out of the ACME driving school.)

Daffy: Now anywho, I'm an experienced driver and I do know the way to the airport to Georgia.

(Daffy arrives at the airport and gets his tickets to go on the plane. Daffy sings "Califoria Here I Come" with motified lyrics)

Daffy (singing): Cargoon Networm here I come!
To get my black and white classic shown on TV!

Daffy: Hey I know the lyrics don't work, but, ain't it a great song?

(Daffy arrives on the plane)

Plane Captain's Voice: We have a special treat instore for all of you for a in-flight movie "Pokemon: The First Movie".


(Daffy sees the Gremlin from "Falling Hare.")

Gremlin: Let's not get nosy bub!

Daffy: YIPE! A g-g-g-g-g-g-gremlin from the Kremlin!

Gremlin: It ain't Vendel Villkie!

(Daffy puts on a paracute and runs straight through the door without opening it making a shape of himself in the airplane)

Daffy: Woo Woo Hoo Hoo Hoo Hoo Hoo!

(Daffy lands in China where they feed him lots of food.)

Daffy (with his mouth full): Say this food is great!

(A Chinese cook starts chasing Daffy with an ax and a meat tenderizor.)

Daffy: What'll I do? Wait! I've got it! They always say that if you dig a hole deep enough you can reach China! Maybe that'll work in reverse!

(Daffy digs a hole and escapes. On the other side of the hole is right in front of the station Cargoon Networm. Daffy goes up to the door and asks an associotie, Beaky Buzzard why they aired the redrawn version of his cartoon.)

Daffy: Why did you air the redrawn version of my cartoon? Couldn't you air the original version?

Beaky Buzzard: Well, uh, we'll see what we can do.

(We fade back to Daffy's house where he's watching Cargoon Networm. But, the network airs "Scooby-Doo" instead of "Daffy's Southern Exposure.")

Daffy: Not that anything but that! They're not even showing MY classic! They're replacing it with that dang great dane, Scooby-Doo!

(An off-screen voice is heard)

Off-screen voice: I know how it feels amigo!

(The camera backs away revealing Speedy Gonzales)


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