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Harley Quinn, Given Harley Quinn’s Bat, Weeps Tears Of Joy

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The title makes sense in context. Sixteen years ago, Kevin “Silent Bob” Smith fathered a child and named her “Harley Quinn.” At the time, it was an obscure reference. Now a Harley Quinn book is one of DC’s best-selling titles and Paul Dini’s crazy blonde is about to star as the center of a major motion picture, WB’s Suicide Squad. It’s never been hotter to be Harley, and Harley should know.

Harley Quinn (the real person) loves Harley Quinn (the character) as much as her dad does. So Kevin used his connections to obtain the actual bat that Margot Robbie wields in the upcoming movie. He presented it as a gift to his daughter, who is now pursuing her own acting career. “I’m not joking when I say I cried for an hour,” wrote Smith upon receiving the bat. “Life is a beautiful, magical thing. I was coincidentally also wearing this sweater.” (It runs in the family — Kevin is usually seen wearing a hockey shirt with a caricature of his own face on it.)

Harley Quinn Smith’s actual acting talents remain to be seen. She’ll make her debut in her father’s new movie Yoga Hosers, but she’s got one eventual goal: to actually play Harley Quinn (the character) at some point. She capped off her Instagram theatrics with “ONE STEP CLOSER TO PLAYING HARLEY QUINN I WILL MAKE YOU PROUD MARGOT.”

Kevin replied, “‘atta girl, Kiddo! Shoot the moon! In a world where “that ******* from Fashionable Male” wound up being the best Batman we’ve ever had, why the **** CAN’T you play Harley Quinn one day? Play her – just never BE her (especially with the lousy taste in men). Always strive to be the Harley Quinn you are now: the Harley Quinn who made my life mean something when she turned me into a Dad.”

Whether Harley Quinn can hack it in Hollywood or not, at least she and her dad are more adorable to watch interact than that other family of Smiths, Will and his creepy brood. Watch for many Kevin Smith films starring Harley Quinn Smith in the decades to come, along with his other future children, Boba Fett Smith and That Chick to The Right From The Trio Who Sang “We Do The Weird Stuff” In Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog Smith. Stay away from Scientology, all of you.

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