Fone Bone
Matt Zimmer
Any other American fans of this classic Britcom besides me? I noticed we don't have a talkback for it and decided to post my review for the latest season. I also have reviews from the earlier seasons I can post if anyone is interested. Let me know. Or just don't post anything at all so I know the interest isn't there.
Here is my review for the Red Dwarf XII Blu-Ray:
Red Dwarf XII
Honestly? I'm disappointed. Which is weird, because this series was filmed and aired concurrently with Series 11, which was fine. But this batch of 6 episodes sort of has the series getting a bit long in the tooth with outdated humor and insults, and Doug Naylor STILL refusing to recognize this has turned into a science fiction show, and bothering to come up with an even SLIGHTLY cohesive mythology, which is something even joke shows like Futurama know enough to do. It's been 28 years, and Red Dwarf still feels like it is made completely on the fly. That's good for an underground humor show. For a show that legitimately tries to do sci-fi? It makes things MUCH messier than they should be. And a lot of this season was a mess, which again is weird because Season 11 was perfectly decent.
I also feel that Doug Naylor is not a good or smart enough writer to be in charge of a show like this for 28 years. Storytelling and humor has grown and evolved in the meantime, and he has not. Say what you will about The X-Files relaunch, but Chris Carter actually modernized the way he told stories, and what he left said and unsaid. He updated the look of the show, and boarded it more like an action-packed modern show, than the quiet, unsettling half-thriller it used to be. The relaunch was exciting in a way the original series was not, and never needed to be. But the X-Files relaunch needed to catch up with Joss Whedon, and J.J. Abrams, and yes, irony of ironies, Vince Gilligan. And Naylor has not gotten with the program of the fact that modern audiences are savvier and demand smarter jokes, and cleverer and more intricate sci-fi plots. And maybe this was always a problem with the show since it returned from the 11 year hiatus, but it's the fact that there are so many weak episodes in this set which makes it more noticeable than usual.
I think the thing that tells me I'm right is that even though I think Doctor Who is pretty badly written, especially during Russell T Davies' tenure, it's still fast, and modern, and updated, and outrageous, and has biting and funny pop culture references, and talks about current real-world concerns and technology. Maybe because that show is made for kids which is why it keeps up with trends so well. But Red Dwarf is still the sci-fi show that refers to videogames as computer games. It's little wonder that if an episode doesn't work, it REALLY doesn't work. Because Naylor is still writing it as if the corny, predictable Rimmer insults occur in a pop-culture vacuum, and not as if fresher and funnier shows have come along in the meantime that makes the fact that Red Dwarf cannot evolve with the times look bad. As long as Brooklyn Nine-Nine and Community as they are exist, Red Dwarf as is is no longer up to snuff. And if Naylor doesn't get his act together, it never will be. And I suspect the scenario of the show never improving is the most likely one.
It feels so strange to negatively review a season of Red Dwarf. Seasons 1 and 2 (especially 1) sucked, but I could actually find a TINY bit of merit in the much hated Seasons and 7 and 8 (especially 7). But Seasons 7 and 8 were so long ago, and even if they were underwhelming, they weren't actually worse than any other average comedy being made at the time. The fact that the show had the couple of off seasons it did was perfectly normal considering the television landscape was that a boring show like Friends was the Number 1 comedy on television. Comedies are not like Friends anymore (thank God) and the good ones never will be again. And I don't think Naylor understands that he isn't writing the show for 1990's audiences anymore. Again, this wasn't a HUGE deal as long as the episodes themselves were okay, but this season gave us two outright duds. In a season of 6. Even Season 8 only had one absolutely horrible episode (Krytie TV) out of 8. I notice the poor quality more when literally a third of the season is crappy. And I might not have noticed it if those two episodes were merely okay instead.
Best episodes of the season are the extremely dark and disturbing "M-Corp", and the season finale that would be acceptable as a series finale to me (Skipper). Worst episodes are the unfunny and unbelievable morality fable (Siliconia), and the episode that might have worked in a Douglas Adams book, but not in a relatively grounded show like Red Dwarf (Timewave). Season Overall: **1/2.
Cured:
I watched this episode a few times, and it admittedly gets better each time. But it is not what it should be. For one thing, the mystery of the climax of the episode actually undoes the entire premise of exploring reformed psychopaths. Suddenly they're robots. Yeah, it makes sense as to why he doesn't actually look like Hitler (great explanation there, to be truthful) but the episode is not actually about a crazy guy building and altering robots. Why did he build and alter those robots and make them look like those historical psychopaths? What did he get from that? What was his end-game? Psychopaths do not contain empathy, but they usually aren't irrational either. There is no clear purpose to what the professor is doing, or why he put himself and the robots in stasis in the first place. I mean, the premise of the episode is already solid. I love them exploring the psychological implications of psychopaths who don't kill people, and the ethical dilemma of leaving everybody behind. Rimmer's reaction is the red herring. I believe Rimmer contains empathy, and is a good person deep down. I don't believe that about The Cat. So maybe the reasons Rimmer wants to leave the doctor, such as having to build wheelchair ramps sounds evil. Honestly? I would have left behind Hitler, Stalin, and the rest, and their creepy scientist babysitter without a moment's hesitation. They are an unnecessary risk to the crew, and considering what they each were responsible for, an unacceptable one as well in my book at least. You can hate Rimmer for bashing having to handicap-proof the Dwarf, but honestly, leaving everybody IS the smart move, so Rimmer is simply talking himself into it. While those feelings are terrible, and involve what a jerk Rimmer is, I don't consider them psychopathic, or at least not medically so. I also have a hard time understanding why Cat has such a bad poker face at the beginning. If he's a psychopath (and that is totally consistent with his previous behavior) he should already know how to put one over on the others. I love the notion that cats do not possess fidelity, and that was Cat manipulating the professor into trusting him enough to hand him the gun so he could cold-bloodedly kill him with a badass look on his face. That look WAS badass and coldblooded and frankly awesome. Another thing I really liked is that they DID set up the Cat being a psychopath simply by not caring what happened to Rimmer in the torture chamber. That was a scary life-threatening situation, and as the finger wagging "Boys from the Dwarf" moment attests, they have been through a lot together. The fact that Cat still doesn't care enough about Rimmer to want to save him is quite disturbing. Speaking of which, Lister's guitar scene with Hitler didn't work. Because Lister sucks at guitar. I could imagine another series with another character not so terrible at the guitar rocking that with Hitler, and making the audience feel uncomfortable with how much they just enjoyed that. But because Lister sucks, I cringe for two reasons. Even if they had a character who played guitar well, it was probably never gonna be great anyways. The Wandering song is literally the best tune they were able to legally license for this episode, so it was never gonna be a smash, no matter what, simply because musicians don't want their songs played and sung by a robot Hitler. Ryan Gage's performance as Hitler was fascinating. He is just so innocent-seeming and adorable, and yet still has the over the top mannerisms that made Hitler so scary. The selfie is SO cute, and yet the "knapsack on my back" moment borders on sick and frightening. When he shyly asks "It's because I'm Hitler, isn't it?" part of me wants to hug him. And the other part of me wants to puke. You know, Cat, if a nymphomaniac says you aren't her type, maybe you need to actually take a step back, and wonder why that actually is. Assess your life, man. Food for thought. My favorite joke was that Rupert Murdoch was not responding to treatment. The only really good thing about the robot scientist ending (besides explaining why Hitler and Stalin looked wrong) was that it explains why we don't actually see Murdoch. If we had followed the premise to the end, he would have been the psychopath on the loose. There are a lot of neat themes explored in the episode that barely get touched on, like the conspiracy theory that Hitler faked his suicide and had kids elsewhere, or the notion of curing evil being stopped because it was bad for the military industrial complex. The exact line was "Society wouldn't work anymore", and that notion bordered on deep. I love Craig Charles' poker face, and similarly love his gravelly line reading for "These United American Johnnys". That voice has only gotten more distinctive with age. I wish the writing on the show had so evolved. Lister talking about the chaos of psychopaths on the loose sounding like his old school landed with a total thud. 20 years ago that joke would have been acceptable. Now it just plain sucks. I love the notion of the doctor saying as a cat, Cat had no "fidelity". What a great, succinct way to put that. And that's maybe only a word a fellow psychopath would use to describe another. The question I have is how the Doc knows enough about the society of Cats that evolved millions of years later to know this. Plothole. It's weird that the studio audience laughs when Kryten says most sociopaths become bankers or politicians. Which says they didn't know that either. But it's actually true, and the show was playing a punchline on something that wasn't actually funny. While I am less inclined to believe in a war fought over whether war is necessary is credible (Spoiler alert: It's not) the episode raised a bunch of other stuff that I was willing to chew over. Interesting, yet frustrating, episode. ***1/2.
Siliconia:
To be blunt, that was lousy. And there have been few Red Dwarf episodes since Season 8 that have been lousy. This qualifies. Red Dwarf works best as a science fiction show. And the best sci-fi takes an ethical dilemma and explores every inch of it, good and bad. Except, as far as I am concerned there is no ethical dilemma involved with MILF. The entire organization is corrupt and abhorrent, and must be destroyed at all costs. It's like not a single person but Kryten walks away from Omelas upon realizing what they were a part of. The Mech 2's are the feeble boy in the dungeon in this scenario. There is no ethical side to explore because the Mechs are naive and misguided at best, and genocidal hypocrites at worst. About the closest thing we got to seeing something worth arguing about is Rimmer saying he preferred being a Mech without his neuroses, and Lister arguing that's what made him him. That was literally the only scene that properly explored a dilemma in a sci-fi manner. And honestly, Rimmer's preferences to live a life of servitude instead of regret sort of moved me on a weird level, which is one of the best and strangest things about the show. You never know when or how the show will deliver a scene out of the blue that kills you dead. That would have been the last episode I would have suspected would contain genuine Rimmer pathos, but here we are. The Mechs themselves are all monsters. I appreciated that when we sort of got a glimpse of Cat shirtless, we didn't actually have to see his six freezing nipples. Sometimes less is more on this show. Good things? I think the special effects for Siliconia was absolutely beautiful, but the happy ending felt completely unearned after all that, as did Kryten parting on friendly terms. It's okay for the show to actually say those guys were villains. There is no ambiguity for them as far as I was concerned. Frankly as beautiful as Siliconia looked is about fake and computer-animated Lister's guitar floating through space looked. I was a little bit shocked at how lousy that effect looked on-screen. Interesting that Kryten doesn't respect the rest of the crew, except as he noted, sometimes Lister. But even that is not all the time. I like that observation, and it was one of the few things in the episode I DID genuinely like. The amused look by Robert Llewellyn also sold it. I noticed that Rimmer was being forced to mop from the length of New York City to Los Angeles. I love that moment, because it is another thing to show that Red Dwarf has a surprising amount of American fans, and the show often tailors the humor for them accordingly. That is not a specific simile a British show needed to use. But because Americans are probably the second biggest fanbase after the Brits, we get it anyways. I also missed a great callback the first couple of times. But when Kryten holds up a pen to Lister, he says that it's a pair of golfing slacks. That is a reference to the first time Lister tried to teach him to lie. I love Kryten's smug look as Lister describes his pride in teaching Kryten to break his programming. He is proud of it too. Kryten describing Rimmer's activities as "Rimmering" was pretty on the nose. "The Boys From The Dwarf" finger wag is tough for Mech-Lister to do with only one hand. Cat breaking his own finger made me cringe and sort of put into sharp focus about how much danger the boys were actually in. Do you know why the Mechs are lame? They seem to be determined to prove their head shapes aren't weird, and are attractive and common sense. They probably care a LOT more about the shape than any single person who has ever made a snide comment about it. Here is a bad thing, and I am reminded about the weakness of the show just by this single line. Rimmer says listening to Lister play the guitar is like somewhere between listening to two velociraptors mating and Yoko Ono's Great Hits. That was an extremely poorly-constructed joke that the show again could have gotten away with 20 years ago, but comedy has evolved since then, so "You're as bad at music as Yoko Ono, Ter Her!" is obvious and unfunny by modern standards. And Naylor never seems to realize that about his insults and similar put-downs, and never updates their delivery for modern audiences accordingly. And I notice how bad this joke actually is because he never does that. For the record, MILF is not entirely wrong. That Mech being forced to clean raw sewage by eating it shows their lives actually DID suck. But still, this was mostly a dud. *.
Timewave:
Another surprisingly lousy episode, although this one is MUCH easier to criticize, which is ironic. But the premise is flawed from the ground up. It is ridiculous and cannot work. It reminds greatly of the Doctor Who episode "Gridlock". That episode is not as hated as it should be. But it is badly written and a completely messed up notion. The idea that people in the future spend their entire lives in a traffic jam that never moves forward is moronic. That's stupid and written by a stupid person. Humans literally cannot live like that, much less adapt to living like that as well as the guest characters did in that episode. It is not in our biology to be able to suffer that specific thing for decades on end. Even prisoners get at least a few hours a day out of their cells simply so as not to go even crazier than they already are. Which brings us to Timewave. Which has a sci-fi premise as ridiculous and hacky as Russell T Davies at his absolute worst. First off, the notion that you get dopamine for criticizing people, and high off that is bogus. That might seem counterintuitive for a negative TV review, but I get neither pleasure nor pain for saying this episode sucked. I dispute the notion that criticism is addictive. That's b.s. and always will be. There are definite behaviors that release dopamine, and give a person a natural high. Gambling is the most obvious example. So is eating. But everybody criticizes, some people do it too much, and some too little, but the only ones actually addicted to it are the sociopaths and the terrible people. The rest of us know it is essential for society. This premise cannot exist under its own logic. How can the crew be arrested for criticism? That is the authorities criticizing the way they express themselves. The angry and disgusted look they get simply for saying the food is lousy is every bit as malicious as that guy who was sentenced to life for tutting. And the point of that guy is not very well stated. Because everybody criticizes. A society cannot function without it. In fact, a police force cannot enforce that specific law if criticism is illegal. The entire thing falls apart upon even rudimentary inspection. And maybe you'll say I'm overthinking a sitcom. But while Red Dwarf owes a great of its premise to Douglas Adams, neither its actual tone or stories very much resemble his extremely obviously-intentioned nonsense. There is too much drama and pathos with the characters, not to mention too many legitimate science fiction stories for me to ever accept a scenario this ludicrous. Red Dwarf is not a cartoonish flight of fancy. It could have been that had Rob Grant and Doug Naylor decided to push it in that direction, but they wound up keeping things relatively grounded. They can't change that specific thing about the show in Season 12. I am allowed to call b.s. on that. To be honest, if Red Dwarf WERE Douglas Adams, I'd probably love the episode. I love the specific way they made sure every single person on that ship was the worst dressed, most obnoxiously behaved, and incompetent person you could ever meet. It's a remarkably good and funny high-concept contrast. Which does not work with Red Dwarf as it currently is in the slightest. The other thing I hated about the episode is that the notion of the Timewave is completely dropped, which makes me wonder why they actually named the episode after this. I had figured in the back of my head that maybe Naylor had wised up and decided to construct a season long story arc involving something like that, which literally every other person in charge of a sci-fi franchise has done, EXCEPT him. But nope, it only effects the first five minutes, so Naylor continues to never know what he's doing. The weird thing is that as Kryten describes it, the Timewave is an actual fascinating concept and could have legitimately made a good episode on its own. Another frustrating thing is Rimmer caring too much about the moon named after him. It's a sociopathic notion, and we just established Rimmer is sane two episodes ago. The writers should not be using this specific inconsistency in the same season, much less ever. Rimmer should have grown enough that jokes like that aren't actually a thing anymore. Doug Naylor's writing this season reminded me unpleasantly of Gene Roddenberry, who I am not afraid to trash. I do not get why Roddenberry is as beloved as he is. I agree that the idea that believing in the best of humanity and a nice future for all of us is a positive thing, and a refreshing way to approach a sci-fi franchise. It's just that if you are going to that, you actually have to understand how people really work. And Gene misjudged why people do things like go to therapy or grieve dying loved ones, and never had his characters actually act like people. It's interesting Gene's notion of human perfection is making everyone boring and well-behaved. As Utopian as that sounds, that is not a society I ever want to live it. If someone like Geordi La Forge is considered normal and likable, and it's WRONG to take shots about how whiny and punkass he is, I'll pass on that Utopia. Hell is better for the company anyways. I agree with the notion that a future where humanity thrives and reaches out to the stars sound amazing. But people don't have to turn into Mary Sue drips for that to happen. And Naylor does a similar thing in the opposite direction. He views on humanity are TOO warped and untrue to real life, and his guest characters don't resemble real people as they existed, or will exist anywhere. I think maybe because of Trump, Red Dwarf feels the need to top itself in outrageousness this year (several slams at American power grabs in this season), but that assumes Trump and his followers are normal and represent people as a whole. The fact that I don't think that's true is why I find the idea of Naylor saying people use criticism as a self-prescribed drug an insane notion, no psychologist anywhere would ever entertain, and it shows me he's just as clueless as the guy who created the insufferable Wesley Crusher to be the person the audience is supposed to relate to. And that's my sci-fi rant for today. I see Naylor's flaws as a writer more heavily this season than any previous season, simply because as bad as Season 8 was compared to everything else on the show, it wasn't unusual for a similar show in that time period. This specific type of unbelievable is not something that infects most current shows, and it certainly doesn't infect any other current GOOD shows. It's because our standards have improved which is why an episode like this is now unacceptable when I would have merely shrugged it off in Series 7 or 8. Last major complaint. The ending was a cliffhanger, and the problem was not actually resolved. I hate that crap, and Red Dwarf did that for about half of its episodes this season, which is why the season is as shaky as it is. For the record, Rimmer's inner critic looks almost exactly like Herr Starr from the show Preacher. I thought the idea of the group panning Rimmer's Inner Critic was a good one, because Rimmer's Inner Critic DID fail. Rimmer got himself and his crew killed because he didn't speak up when he should have. That was an interesting notion. Cat calling Kryten "Easter Island Head" was funny, but the REAL great Cat moment was his "Lieutenant ahole" rant. That was a thing of beauty, right down to Cat making fun of his wife's probably droopy t words. And when the guy describes his crime of tutting, Cat realizes exactly what a fix he's in. I especially love the guy accidentally tutting upon being recaught by the police, and realizing in horror what he's done. I also liked the joke that Lister's "Om Song" would be popular on that station. The fat cop rubbing his body in ecstasy over him finally allowing himself to criticize something was a joke that was gross, and I disliked that the precise reason it was gross was fat-shaming. Red Dwarf is NOT a politically correct at show all, but it is so much less politically correct than other shows that I watch that I noticed, and am disturbed by stuff like that. Good Rimmer writing: Remembering Rimmer does not need a spacesuit on the moon. Bad Rimmer writing: Saying he got his love nuggets burned by the coffee. That's not credible. Despite being a hard light hologram, he IS a hologram, and cannot get hurt in the same way regular people can, especially down there. I again like Craig Charles' line reading on saying "slug it out and then get back up again". He is SO great at that type of line. "As hard to understand as a drunken Scotsman giving directions," is a pretty good joke for this show. It's timeless like the best of Red Dwarf insults, but it's not too obvious or too random, which means I find it up to modern standards which is not usual for this show's jokes like that. I like Rimmer stating his name and rank in the machine and following it up with "Class Kryten Shut Up", which was funny and cunning of him to do. It was also funny that he demanded that they let one of them go as a show of good faith, and that he'd like to volunteer. I don't actually think Rimmer thinks through the implications about what would happen to him if the rest of the crew died, but Rimmer is funny because he NEVER thinks about those kinds of consequences, and his cowardice always comes first. Even if in this precise scenario it is crucial to him actually getting to safety that all of his friends survive. Is this the first Red Dwarf episode to specify the crew is from the 23rd Century? I'm thinking maybe Back To Earth detailed that too at one point, but I'm not sure. One of the interesting facets about the criticism gimmick this episode is something Red Dwarf is USUALLY good at, even in the bad episodes. But it explores the concept entirely, even in ways that aren't actually a joke. The cop is honest to his superior that he betrayed his uniform, and everything he stood for, but because of the law, his boss simply let it go as if it was no big deal. And that's not actually funny, and it's the fact that it's not funny which is why it was one of the few demonstrations of this law in action that actually worked for me. Terrible episode otherwise. 1/2.
Mechocracy:
Part of that I liked, but part of it sort of lost its way. First off, I love the notion that the machines saved the ship from the crisis by pooling together their processing power. And that makes the fact that the crew was going to leave them when they abandoned ship legitimately unacceptable. And a strike is the only answer to that. The machines have value to the crew's well-being, and if The Boys From The Dwarf (hands shake) don't recognize that, screw them. Ironically, is it entirely impractical to take all of the machines during a worst-case abandon ship scenario. How exactly would they bring the lifts anyways? The proper answer is to take better care of the Dwarf, and not be dumb enough to fall for random S.O.S. viruses. Maybe it's unreasonable for the machines to expect to also go on Starbug during an emergency evacuation. But maybe there wouldn't be so many emergencies if Lister and Cat were smarter and more responsible. I found when the episode turned into a political satire that it sort of lost its way. It's not only sci-fi show, it's a sitcom, so they basically use the heaviest touch possible. And I'm the guy who hated Mark Russell. So you can imagine how insipid I found this. But then the episode does something amazing: It brings back Talkie Toaster! And he's amazing, and saves the episode. The biggest problem to me is that now I'm questioning why Doug Naylor refused to bring him back for 20 years. Apparently, the single best guest character since Kryten in the first episode of season 2, has been on the Dwarf the entire time. And instead of making him a super-popular running gag, Naylor drops the character because he's annoying. Yeah, he's annoying! That's why he's funny! For the record, he is not only far less annoying than Rimmer, he's far funnier too. Which means Naylor doesn't have a leg to stand on by keeping him from us. Craig Charles, man. There is nobody who plays off Talkie Toaster better than him. Not Chris Barrie, not even Hattie Haybridge. The amount of put-upon misery and resignation in his voice is actually far more than the situation calls for, but that's again why it's funny. Talkie Toaster should not upset any normal person the specific personal way he does Dave Lister. And Craig Charles, God bless him, sells every inch of that pain. There was one political joke I really liked, about the controversy of when a document actually becomes a document, and when it's okay to delete or destroy them. The episode has a lame punchline to that by Rimmer saying he agrees with whatever they believe, but that's actually a REALLY smart satirical joke about abortion, in a series not especially known for smart, satirical jokes. There is a legit argument to be made that Red Dwarf is the single lowest-brow science fiction show that ever existed. God bless Seth MacFarlane's The Orville for trying to break that record, but that show is far too smart for that most weeks. One of my favorite moments was probably one of the most predictable. It was Rimmer promoting Lister so he could demote him. I love that scene. I love how much Rimmer actually legitimately winds him up. And Lister may be quite accomplished at standing, but he's a novice when it comes to getting his heart stomped on. This is the guy who believes he will someday track down and marry his own mother. And if Rimmer IS especially cruel for this, it's only because Lister's dumb enough to take him the slightest bit seriously to begin with. Does Rimmer actually think that face he's making makes an attractive campaign poster? Rimmer's smug insane look is not something he should be aware he is doing. Much less something he greenlights for a publicity photo. I liked the opening scene of Kryten quietly waiting at a table and then tricking Rimmer into believing he is learning a lesson about being patient, in which Rimmer immediately horns in on. But it turns out the lesson isn't actually for Kryten, it's for Rimmer. I have a feeling that "About as safe as having unprotected sex in Doncaster" is probably a really funny joke, but since I don't know where Doncaster is, or what kind of people of are actually in it, I don't know for sure. But I'm pretty sure Doncaster was just Dadded, or on this show, Dwarfed. This is the first episode that refers back to the fact that Kryten was serving skeletons for decades before the crew found him ("I was only gone for a minute!"). It also has footage of Crazy Rimmer with Mr. Flibble in the file footage for Kryten's smear campaign. I like how distasteful Kryten found the idea of not calling Lister "Sir" and calling him "Dave", or even worse, Lister calling him "Sir". When his face lights up and says "I did it!" I remembered why I adore the character in the first place. I liked Kryten pointing out to Lister that machines HAD already taken over the world, and Lister wondering if he should actually be worried. That was actually a REALLY good question in this precise scenario. I loved Cat calling Rimmer "Waterslide Nostrils". Chris Barrie DOES have distinctively shaped nostrils, doesn't he? Pretty good episode, mostly saved by the amazing Talkie Toaster at the end. ***1/2.
M-Corp:
This is probably the darkest episode the show has done since Season 8. Unlike Season 8, which was a mess of hurt feelings for the fans, this is dynamite. First off, it does something all good sci-fi should do: Comes up with a great allegory. And the best sci-fi comes up with an allegory far worse than real life to set the proper example, and make the moral land exactly right. This episode is anti-corporation and anti-big business. That's not unheard of in science fiction. That describes Star Trek's Ferengi perfectly. Except while as exaggerated as the Ferengi are, they aren't actually evil. Their values are warped, but they aren't bad people as a whole or as a society. This is far darker and more disturbing than the Ferengi because it involves not only artificial intelligence, but also the conquest of Earth. And everything about M-Corp is pretty much the worst, most cartoonish, and most evil thing you could ever think about Big Business, including deliberately making you sick to overcharge for a cure, and actually charging poor people their vitality and essence to brainwash them into buying their cr*p. And selling water for 400 dollar pounds a glass. And even starting fires to sell extinguishers. And the notion that Earth fell because they started charging thought is absolutely insidious. This entire episode (and many episodes this season) say something about this Universe's Earth that previous episodes didn't say. But Lister and the Red Dwarf weren't the pinnacle of human civilization, the way the Federation was for humanity in Star Trek. This happened AFTER that. But societies and civilizations have risen and fallen since Dave went to sleep, and his version of civilized society is probably not the most recent one. Heck, the one that popped up after M-Corp (if humanity didn't actually get destroyed by it) was probably also felled by something else later on in the future too. The series seems to take the tack, "It's always something." So we can repeat till we are blue in the face about the Holocaust, "Never again," Trump still gets in, and babies are still put in cages. There IS no stopping us half destroying ourselves every 80 years. The Federation is a nice idea, but in reality, it would probably only last for three quarters of a century before being taken over by a human-led dictatorship. That's how society works, and the timeframe of human evolution. Gene Roddenberry mistakenly believed the path forward for humanity is a straight line of things always getting better. In reality, it is always going to be a constant struggle. We did not realize how significant the election in 2016 was going to be until we lost it. We had no idea how slippery of a footing our American ideals and notions of good and evil actually were until that happened. And if we miraculously win against Trump, and his brand of evil IS stomped out? It's just gonna come back in 80 years. And it always was. That is a true adult science fiction concept that the show just showed me, and reminded me the value of the show. Heck the show actually often forgets it has real value, and has done that a LOT this season too. But like "Lemons" a couple of seasons back, when the show gets a good idea and explores every inch of it, it can still be amazing. Sadly, not every week. And in Season 12, even less than usual. But episodes like this show the value of the concept, and why I believe it in, and find Lister's struggles more relatable than Captain Picard's. One thing I regret is the fact that the very first scene of the series 28 years ago was boring and unfunny. And God bless the audience for still recognizing the callback in the very last scene and cheering it. They remembered and loved something from 20 years ago that was neither memorable nor lovable. But I imagine if Red Dwarf DID have an amazing first scene 28 years ago, that callback would have made me smile too. My one complaint about this great episode is that the logic and timeframe don't hold up. If M-Corp is sending those updates, that means they should have taken over Earth in the 23rd Century, not the 26th. If the show were operating on the right chronology, that software patch wouldn't hit the ship for another 300 years. Also while the teleporter makes it plausible, I don't really see the story logic of M-Corp items and goodies appearing on the ship once the new software was downloaded. I love Kryten pointing out that Lister has nothing, which makes him so easy to shop for. And Rimmer detailing Lister's potential retirement sounds funny, as he's already pretty much a useless layabout. But the notion becomes openly tragic when you witness him trying to complete his day without his friends. It always interests me that Lister still shaves even though he has no reason to. It is super uncommon that all four male leads on the show have no facial hair in 2018. Danny John-Jules has a beard in real-life, but he shaves for the show. Honestly, the reason I personally shave is because facial hair feel like "extra face" to me, and I always feel "lighter" clean-shaven, if you can buy that. My face feels fresher and cleaner when it is smooth too, than when I've lost track of it for a couple of days. It's also far less itchy. I do not get the modern trend in television of scruffy half-beards. That's got to be super uncomfortable. The invisible beer in the face was a funny visual, and again Craig Charles has a perfect line reading upon Kryten asking if he could investigate further: "Permission granted". The invisible vibrator was funny, but I question what it's even doing on the Dwarf in the first place. I can believe a female crew member had it 28 years ago before the ship blew up, but I don't see why Kryten hasn't thrown it out the airlock in the meantime. Maybe it's Kochanski's and it had sentimental value? I'm spitballing here, simply because that joke makes no sense. I love Gary, just because he thinks he's a good friend because he's crap at "computer games" (weird thing to call videogames) and that means Dave will always win. Sorry, Gary. There IS no winning with you as a friend, no matter what the scoreboard says. I love that Rimmer loves Yellow Alerts. It means someone is in danger, but it isn't you. Speaking a bit too soon there, Rimsie. Kryten tricking the Host into selling him a virus was a great resolution, because not only did the crew win, but the Host technically did too. It STILL sold them the way out, so it did what it was setting out to do, which is a fabulous and twisted moral. Did I mention this episode was super dark and subversive, even for this show? *****.
Skipper:
Over 28 years, Red Dwarf has evolved its thinking on season finales. They used to end on cliffhangers to try to get BBC to renew the show. And after Season 8, the show was put on indefinite hiatus instead, leaving a huge cliffhanger unresolved. What was most infuriating about the cliffhangers is that the producers almost never bothered to resolve anything. They'd pick up a few months later after we are told everything worked out fine. And yeah, when the show came back 11 years later, they did it again. But for the series' next few seasons on Dave, they stopped doing cliffhangers altogether because of how infuriating it was for the audience to be left dangling in Season Finales for a resolution the writers weren't ever going to bother to come up with. So instead we get regular episodes for finales. This better for the long-term health of the show, but the show is not going to run forever. It only comes back if all four casts members agree to do it. Even if they always said yes, they aren't going to live forever. And they are getting old. I feel that a series like Red Dwarf, which has been on and off the air for 28 years is the kind of show that deserves a good series finale. And as long as nobody is sure they are coming back, we aren't going to get one. As long as it isn't a cliffhanger, I won't mind too much though. Do you know what the best finale ending was? Back To Earth. But that MIGHT have been the series finale, and almost was. Now it's up to the cast and probably will be from now on. For an episode that ISN'T a series finale, it's kind of amazing the finale touches they put in it in case one of the cast members dies between the hiatus. It's not a satisfying finale exactly. But it's also a good episode to be the absolute last. I mean Holly returns to thunderous studio audience applause, as does Mac MacDonald to similar cheers. The return of the original bunk beds had the audience sighing in nostalgia too. It's not a last episode, or good wrap-up for the characters or the story. But for the franchise it was a good look back in case it IS the last one. It probably won't be. But Holly returning was such a huge thing that I won't object if it is. The amazing thing about the episode is that I could spend all day nitpicking and criticizing it. First of all, I have always loved the Multiverse theory and the idea that a new Universe is created every time a single person makes a choice. The problem with Red Dwarf is that in the Multiverse seen here, the choices are binary. But really, in every scenario you can imagine, there is actually more than one choice. Maybe there is an entirely separate Universe created because 73 years ago a guy named Harold once brushed his teeth a millimeter to the right of the one in our Universe. That's the ONLY difference. But because it IS a difference, it created a Universe. Just thinking about the infinite implications of that is astounding. Maybe there are entire Universes that are created solely by atoms in the air and the breeze traveling at a slightly different microscopic direction for one millisecond in history. Only slightly off on an atomic level, but a Universe is created anyways. And OUR Universe is already pretty dang infinite and unending in and of itself. Imagine an infinite number of those out there, some wildly different, some slightly different, simply because choices are never binary. That's the first critique. The second is that the show doesn't remember to keep its stories straight. It's fun to see Rimmer trying to navigate the actual catastrophe that killed everybody, but the cast has aged 28 years since the Pilot. This is not a scenario he can believably be placed in. If the crew are all alive 28 years later, that would make sense. But they can't redo that specific thing. Even more troubling is the idea that he has the giant H on his forehead. If as Holly says nobody is dead, he shouldn't be a hologram. I feel like the producers wanted to give him his original design just once for the fans, without bothering to think that it makes no sense in any Universe we see him alive in. I gotta say Danny-John Jules kills as the Rat. You cannot even tell it's him. While Cat always had some jazz and disco to him, Rat is a stone cold 80's American rap gangster. And he's SO funny. And frankly, as nice as that Universe seemed otherwise, he was a REAL good excuse to leave it as soon as possible. I would not stay either. Another plothole might not be a plothole. But Lister should not be able to eat the biscuit Cat gave him. Unless he actually chose to put it down. Did I mention this episode and the entire Multiverse premise is fun to think about and wrap your head around? For the record, I am stunned Ace Rimmer was never mentioned. I was like "Rimmer already did this." As far as I was concerned, Ace was the elephant in room. Or maybe the kippers. I like Rimmer's notion that to be successful you need to surround yourself with people better than you. And then his friends point out he actually did that, and I realize how utterly screwed this poor guy is. I find it a bit strange that people from the 23rd Century understand and can identify the two weirdness levels of 1989 Michael Jackson, and 1993 Michael Jackson. That is a weirdly specific detail to make the history books. Speaking of successful and unsuccessful similes, this episode had a good one and two duds. The good one was Kryten saying Red Dwarf couldn't outrun a fat guy with uranium in his backpack after eating a family fun bucket. That is not the most economically structured joke ever, granted, but the fact that there are multiple levels to it is why it is acceptable by modern standards. Do you know what isn't? The seriously lame observations that it's as desirable as vampires eating garlic bread, or that something falls apart quicker than Jabba the Hutt's diet plan. And I bowed my head at the TV and said out-loud to no-one in particular, "Do you know what you could actually do, Doug Naylor? Try. That is not too much to ask." I love the gleeful way Dave is taking advantage of the Cat's stupidity and refusing to understand how this actually works. At least until the lifts when the Cat's stupidity starts working against him. I love Lister's gravelly voice for Nice Chap Lister. I feel like Craig Charles and Danny John-Jules has an extra amount of fun this episode. It's weird that the Cats having a Holy War on Red Dwarf before leaving to find the promised land is referenced here. Because the closest thing to all of that actually being canon is The Lost Episode from Season 7 that was never made. I love that the main thing Lister takes from Captain Hollister's report is that he's bright. You know what? That's what he SHOULD have taken from it. Good for him. I like Holly's joke about the port, brandy, and sherry. Holly saying he was tested, and then admitting he failed the test because he forgot to turn the paper over was Classic Holly. If this is it, they did it right. If it isn't, they can easily come back. It was a perfect finale in that it wasn't a definite ending, and yet did things a proper last episode should do. I hope nobody goes and dies on us. But if they don't, they can easily come back. If they do, that was a decent stopping point. *****.
The 28 Years Later Affair:
Lot of insights into the making of the episodes. I think it's neat that prosthetics can now just scan an actor's head and 3-D print the correct inside to the mask. That's kind of awesome. I was a little annoyed that Doug Naylor wrote Cured because he was surprised by the notion that psychopaths don't all kill people. Do you know what that is? That's a Gene Roddenberry problem. That's somebody who is in charge of a huge sci-fi franchise involving the future of the human race not actually understanding how people work. And it strikes me that that kind of psychological research should have been done by him ages ago, especially not only because of Cat, but because people might have mistaken Rimmer for that too under different circumstances. It was interesting that 20 songs were rejected for the scene with Lister and Hitler. No-one wanted their music associated with that. Honestly, that's understandable. For the record, that scene was totally off-putting to me as well. It's amazing they got David Ross back for Talkie Toaster. That was SUCH a popular and beloved character. Why did it take 20-some-odd years to see him again? What exactly was Doug Naylor resisting there? Speaking of fan favorite moments, here is a good rule of thumb for Red Dwarf: If you want the studio audience to go nuts during a finale of Red Dwarf, bring in Norman Lovett under cover of darkness. Like for Nanarchy, the roof simply went off the joint once Holly appeared. Lovett famously has never been into science fiction, but he confessed he saw Serenity and loved it, and went back and watched Firefly. Robert Llewellyn mentions that Kryten loses his morality in the election episode, and starts lying like a politician, but I have watched that episode a few times, and don't see him saying anything untrue during it whatsoever. Power-mad allegory FAIL. It's amazing they recreated the original sets for the last episode. For the record, those sets look awesome. I appreciated the idea that the studio audience immediately got the callback to the first scene of the series in the final moments of M-Corp. But the thing that saddened me about that callback, is that the first scene of Red Dwarf, and in fact the entire first series, is not very good or memorable. Outside of the "Everybody's dead, Dave" scene (which Skipper did a perfect callback to as well), the whole series is slow and boring. It's amazing it not only came back from that, but turned into what it became. But I mean, a different show doing a callback to the first scene of the franchise would have a better and more iconic scene to pay homage to. It's almost a shame. I hope the series comes back. But I'm glad they've stopped doing cliffhangers at any rate. ****.
Deleted Scenes:
Deleted scenes on Red Dwarf are known for 2 things. 1. There are a TON of them. 2. They are almost all terrible. Neither statement is true this year. There's a few, but no more than an average TV show. And most of the scenes are all right and clearly just cut for time. The scene of Rat dancing in the corridor to "I'm gonna get you little cheesies" like Cat did in the first episode with his "I'm gonna get you little fishies," was funny, and I liked Kryten and Rimmer discussing evilness and beards. And Kryten objects that all Rimmer's examples (Fu Manchu, Ming The Merciless, General Zod, Han Gruber and Jafar from Aladdin) are fictional, and Rimmer wisely replies he's the guy who brought up Father Christmas and Jesus. The scene where Lister tells Kryten to use his sonic screwdriveresque finger to open the door is made funnier by Kryten saying it would probably just be easier to push the button that says "Open". Lister's "Don't Be Ovulating Tonight" song (complete with Chris Barrie harmonizing at the end) was amazing, and seems to be the original ending to Siliconia. Honestly? It was WAY better and more satisfying than the one we got. That should have stayed in the episode, even if it meant something else had to be cut. I also like the scene where Lister argues Rimmer's reality and purpose is to keep him sane. I see why that was cut. They already do that at least once a season and a better version was in the season finale. I like Lister talking about having to fight the kids at his potential kids' school. Because of the premise, they can't really do the Grumpy Old Man Lister. But that brief moment shows us what it would look like. I love the critics badmouthing Citizen Kane. Seriously. How does anyone even KNOW his last words were "Rosebud"? He died alone and there was nobody else there. How was this even a mystery, much less the greatest film that ever existed? That should have been in the episode and saved for pop culture posterity. Surprisingly good batch this year. For this series at least, Doug Naylor ran a pretty tight ship. ****.
Smeg Ups:
I seem to say it every series. If you could give me tickets to any sitcom being taped, Red Dwarf would be my last choice. There is a plot you have to follow. Which would be all right. Except for the amount of mistakes and bloopers the actors and crew make. They would constantly have to stop the taping and reshoot all of the goofs. And there are SO many. It's unprofessional. I imagine there are theater actors out there (like say Ian McKellan) who would be absolutely gobsmacked and outright offended at how often the cast and crew messes up. It would be hell to watch that taping for me. I would be beyond frustrated. How are the Smegs ups? Honestly, Craig Charles losing it over the Rat was infectious, especially once Danny John-Jules starts mugging and shaking around. And Norman Lovett giving the finger was funny too. It's weird, but this is only the second show I've learned British people call tea "a cuppa Cha". And the first was Danger Mouse. It amazes me I heard this term for the first and second time one night after the other as I'm watching both series concurrently (and Danger Mouse is taking MUCH longer). Interestingly, in a scene that was clearly cut, Kryten DOES actually tell a single lie (or rather tries to) by valuing Cat's supposed contribution for setting up the debates. But he can't even bring himself to do that. I love the look on Kryten's face when the Mech puts his hand on his thigh. For the record, there was a joke earlier in the season that Lister has ALWAYS been this fat. And even if that isn't actually true, and Craig Charles HAS put on a few in middle-age, it was still SORT of true. Lister was never fit and always a bit pudgy. Rewatching the series (especially the Smeg Ups) I realize something amazing: That isn't true of Robert Llewellyn and Kryten. The only guy on the show whose character cannot gain weight has massively packed it on. I always ragged on Brent Spiner in Star Trek: Insurrection for letting himself get a bit chunky when playing Data in that movie, but Kryten's massive weight gain is something else entirely. I can ignore Data getting slightly doughy. They've actually had to completely let out the Kryten costume so Llewellyn can still fit in it. I love Craig Charles screaming and laughing "28 years!" Here's to 28 more. If I actually paid for tickets to Red Dwarf, I would demand my money back after the episode ended. For the record, there were fewer bloopers this year than average. And yet, the gag reel is about the same length as one for a 22 episode American hour long drama series. Which is another thing to state that Red Dwarf is a show made entirely on the fly, and that's still true 28 years later. ***1/2.
Here is my review for the Red Dwarf XII Blu-Ray:
Red Dwarf XII
Honestly? I'm disappointed. Which is weird, because this series was filmed and aired concurrently with Series 11, which was fine. But this batch of 6 episodes sort of has the series getting a bit long in the tooth with outdated humor and insults, and Doug Naylor STILL refusing to recognize this has turned into a science fiction show, and bothering to come up with an even SLIGHTLY cohesive mythology, which is something even joke shows like Futurama know enough to do. It's been 28 years, and Red Dwarf still feels like it is made completely on the fly. That's good for an underground humor show. For a show that legitimately tries to do sci-fi? It makes things MUCH messier than they should be. And a lot of this season was a mess, which again is weird because Season 11 was perfectly decent.
I also feel that Doug Naylor is not a good or smart enough writer to be in charge of a show like this for 28 years. Storytelling and humor has grown and evolved in the meantime, and he has not. Say what you will about The X-Files relaunch, but Chris Carter actually modernized the way he told stories, and what he left said and unsaid. He updated the look of the show, and boarded it more like an action-packed modern show, than the quiet, unsettling half-thriller it used to be. The relaunch was exciting in a way the original series was not, and never needed to be. But the X-Files relaunch needed to catch up with Joss Whedon, and J.J. Abrams, and yes, irony of ironies, Vince Gilligan. And Naylor has not gotten with the program of the fact that modern audiences are savvier and demand smarter jokes, and cleverer and more intricate sci-fi plots. And maybe this was always a problem with the show since it returned from the 11 year hiatus, but it's the fact that there are so many weak episodes in this set which makes it more noticeable than usual.
I think the thing that tells me I'm right is that even though I think Doctor Who is pretty badly written, especially during Russell T Davies' tenure, it's still fast, and modern, and updated, and outrageous, and has biting and funny pop culture references, and talks about current real-world concerns and technology. Maybe because that show is made for kids which is why it keeps up with trends so well. But Red Dwarf is still the sci-fi show that refers to videogames as computer games. It's little wonder that if an episode doesn't work, it REALLY doesn't work. Because Naylor is still writing it as if the corny, predictable Rimmer insults occur in a pop-culture vacuum, and not as if fresher and funnier shows have come along in the meantime that makes the fact that Red Dwarf cannot evolve with the times look bad. As long as Brooklyn Nine-Nine and Community as they are exist, Red Dwarf as is is no longer up to snuff. And if Naylor doesn't get his act together, it never will be. And I suspect the scenario of the show never improving is the most likely one.
It feels so strange to negatively review a season of Red Dwarf. Seasons 1 and 2 (especially 1) sucked, but I could actually find a TINY bit of merit in the much hated Seasons and 7 and 8 (especially 7). But Seasons 7 and 8 were so long ago, and even if they were underwhelming, they weren't actually worse than any other average comedy being made at the time. The fact that the show had the couple of off seasons it did was perfectly normal considering the television landscape was that a boring show like Friends was the Number 1 comedy on television. Comedies are not like Friends anymore (thank God) and the good ones never will be again. And I don't think Naylor understands that he isn't writing the show for 1990's audiences anymore. Again, this wasn't a HUGE deal as long as the episodes themselves were okay, but this season gave us two outright duds. In a season of 6. Even Season 8 only had one absolutely horrible episode (Krytie TV) out of 8. I notice the poor quality more when literally a third of the season is crappy. And I might not have noticed it if those two episodes were merely okay instead.
Best episodes of the season are the extremely dark and disturbing "M-Corp", and the season finale that would be acceptable as a series finale to me (Skipper). Worst episodes are the unfunny and unbelievable morality fable (Siliconia), and the episode that might have worked in a Douglas Adams book, but not in a relatively grounded show like Red Dwarf (Timewave). Season Overall: **1/2.
Cured:
I watched this episode a few times, and it admittedly gets better each time. But it is not what it should be. For one thing, the mystery of the climax of the episode actually undoes the entire premise of exploring reformed psychopaths. Suddenly they're robots. Yeah, it makes sense as to why he doesn't actually look like Hitler (great explanation there, to be truthful) but the episode is not actually about a crazy guy building and altering robots. Why did he build and alter those robots and make them look like those historical psychopaths? What did he get from that? What was his end-game? Psychopaths do not contain empathy, but they usually aren't irrational either. There is no clear purpose to what the professor is doing, or why he put himself and the robots in stasis in the first place. I mean, the premise of the episode is already solid. I love them exploring the psychological implications of psychopaths who don't kill people, and the ethical dilemma of leaving everybody behind. Rimmer's reaction is the red herring. I believe Rimmer contains empathy, and is a good person deep down. I don't believe that about The Cat. So maybe the reasons Rimmer wants to leave the doctor, such as having to build wheelchair ramps sounds evil. Honestly? I would have left behind Hitler, Stalin, and the rest, and their creepy scientist babysitter without a moment's hesitation. They are an unnecessary risk to the crew, and considering what they each were responsible for, an unacceptable one as well in my book at least. You can hate Rimmer for bashing having to handicap-proof the Dwarf, but honestly, leaving everybody IS the smart move, so Rimmer is simply talking himself into it. While those feelings are terrible, and involve what a jerk Rimmer is, I don't consider them psychopathic, or at least not medically so. I also have a hard time understanding why Cat has such a bad poker face at the beginning. If he's a psychopath (and that is totally consistent with his previous behavior) he should already know how to put one over on the others. I love the notion that cats do not possess fidelity, and that was Cat manipulating the professor into trusting him enough to hand him the gun so he could cold-bloodedly kill him with a badass look on his face. That look WAS badass and coldblooded and frankly awesome. Another thing I really liked is that they DID set up the Cat being a psychopath simply by not caring what happened to Rimmer in the torture chamber. That was a scary life-threatening situation, and as the finger wagging "Boys from the Dwarf" moment attests, they have been through a lot together. The fact that Cat still doesn't care enough about Rimmer to want to save him is quite disturbing. Speaking of which, Lister's guitar scene with Hitler didn't work. Because Lister sucks at guitar. I could imagine another series with another character not so terrible at the guitar rocking that with Hitler, and making the audience feel uncomfortable with how much they just enjoyed that. But because Lister sucks, I cringe for two reasons. Even if they had a character who played guitar well, it was probably never gonna be great anyways. The Wandering song is literally the best tune they were able to legally license for this episode, so it was never gonna be a smash, no matter what, simply because musicians don't want their songs played and sung by a robot Hitler. Ryan Gage's performance as Hitler was fascinating. He is just so innocent-seeming and adorable, and yet still has the over the top mannerisms that made Hitler so scary. The selfie is SO cute, and yet the "knapsack on my back" moment borders on sick and frightening. When he shyly asks "It's because I'm Hitler, isn't it?" part of me wants to hug him. And the other part of me wants to puke. You know, Cat, if a nymphomaniac says you aren't her type, maybe you need to actually take a step back, and wonder why that actually is. Assess your life, man. Food for thought. My favorite joke was that Rupert Murdoch was not responding to treatment. The only really good thing about the robot scientist ending (besides explaining why Hitler and Stalin looked wrong) was that it explains why we don't actually see Murdoch. If we had followed the premise to the end, he would have been the psychopath on the loose. There are a lot of neat themes explored in the episode that barely get touched on, like the conspiracy theory that Hitler faked his suicide and had kids elsewhere, or the notion of curing evil being stopped because it was bad for the military industrial complex. The exact line was "Society wouldn't work anymore", and that notion bordered on deep. I love Craig Charles' poker face, and similarly love his gravelly line reading for "These United American Johnnys". That voice has only gotten more distinctive with age. I wish the writing on the show had so evolved. Lister talking about the chaos of psychopaths on the loose sounding like his old school landed with a total thud. 20 years ago that joke would have been acceptable. Now it just plain sucks. I love the notion of the doctor saying as a cat, Cat had no "fidelity". What a great, succinct way to put that. And that's maybe only a word a fellow psychopath would use to describe another. The question I have is how the Doc knows enough about the society of Cats that evolved millions of years later to know this. Plothole. It's weird that the studio audience laughs when Kryten says most sociopaths become bankers or politicians. Which says they didn't know that either. But it's actually true, and the show was playing a punchline on something that wasn't actually funny. While I am less inclined to believe in a war fought over whether war is necessary is credible (Spoiler alert: It's not) the episode raised a bunch of other stuff that I was willing to chew over. Interesting, yet frustrating, episode. ***1/2.
Siliconia:
To be blunt, that was lousy. And there have been few Red Dwarf episodes since Season 8 that have been lousy. This qualifies. Red Dwarf works best as a science fiction show. And the best sci-fi takes an ethical dilemma and explores every inch of it, good and bad. Except, as far as I am concerned there is no ethical dilemma involved with MILF. The entire organization is corrupt and abhorrent, and must be destroyed at all costs. It's like not a single person but Kryten walks away from Omelas upon realizing what they were a part of. The Mech 2's are the feeble boy in the dungeon in this scenario. There is no ethical side to explore because the Mechs are naive and misguided at best, and genocidal hypocrites at worst. About the closest thing we got to seeing something worth arguing about is Rimmer saying he preferred being a Mech without his neuroses, and Lister arguing that's what made him him. That was literally the only scene that properly explored a dilemma in a sci-fi manner. And honestly, Rimmer's preferences to live a life of servitude instead of regret sort of moved me on a weird level, which is one of the best and strangest things about the show. You never know when or how the show will deliver a scene out of the blue that kills you dead. That would have been the last episode I would have suspected would contain genuine Rimmer pathos, but here we are. The Mechs themselves are all monsters. I appreciated that when we sort of got a glimpse of Cat shirtless, we didn't actually have to see his six freezing nipples. Sometimes less is more on this show. Good things? I think the special effects for Siliconia was absolutely beautiful, but the happy ending felt completely unearned after all that, as did Kryten parting on friendly terms. It's okay for the show to actually say those guys were villains. There is no ambiguity for them as far as I was concerned. Frankly as beautiful as Siliconia looked is about fake and computer-animated Lister's guitar floating through space looked. I was a little bit shocked at how lousy that effect looked on-screen. Interesting that Kryten doesn't respect the rest of the crew, except as he noted, sometimes Lister. But even that is not all the time. I like that observation, and it was one of the few things in the episode I DID genuinely like. The amused look by Robert Llewellyn also sold it. I noticed that Rimmer was being forced to mop from the length of New York City to Los Angeles. I love that moment, because it is another thing to show that Red Dwarf has a surprising amount of American fans, and the show often tailors the humor for them accordingly. That is not a specific simile a British show needed to use. But because Americans are probably the second biggest fanbase after the Brits, we get it anyways. I also missed a great callback the first couple of times. But when Kryten holds up a pen to Lister, he says that it's a pair of golfing slacks. That is a reference to the first time Lister tried to teach him to lie. I love Kryten's smug look as Lister describes his pride in teaching Kryten to break his programming. He is proud of it too. Kryten describing Rimmer's activities as "Rimmering" was pretty on the nose. "The Boys From The Dwarf" finger wag is tough for Mech-Lister to do with only one hand. Cat breaking his own finger made me cringe and sort of put into sharp focus about how much danger the boys were actually in. Do you know why the Mechs are lame? They seem to be determined to prove their head shapes aren't weird, and are attractive and common sense. They probably care a LOT more about the shape than any single person who has ever made a snide comment about it. Here is a bad thing, and I am reminded about the weakness of the show just by this single line. Rimmer says listening to Lister play the guitar is like somewhere between listening to two velociraptors mating and Yoko Ono's Great Hits. That was an extremely poorly-constructed joke that the show again could have gotten away with 20 years ago, but comedy has evolved since then, so "You're as bad at music as Yoko Ono, Ter Her!" is obvious and unfunny by modern standards. And Naylor never seems to realize that about his insults and similar put-downs, and never updates their delivery for modern audiences accordingly. And I notice how bad this joke actually is because he never does that. For the record, MILF is not entirely wrong. That Mech being forced to clean raw sewage by eating it shows their lives actually DID suck. But still, this was mostly a dud. *.
Timewave:
Another surprisingly lousy episode, although this one is MUCH easier to criticize, which is ironic. But the premise is flawed from the ground up. It is ridiculous and cannot work. It reminds greatly of the Doctor Who episode "Gridlock". That episode is not as hated as it should be. But it is badly written and a completely messed up notion. The idea that people in the future spend their entire lives in a traffic jam that never moves forward is moronic. That's stupid and written by a stupid person. Humans literally cannot live like that, much less adapt to living like that as well as the guest characters did in that episode. It is not in our biology to be able to suffer that specific thing for decades on end. Even prisoners get at least a few hours a day out of their cells simply so as not to go even crazier than they already are. Which brings us to Timewave. Which has a sci-fi premise as ridiculous and hacky as Russell T Davies at his absolute worst. First off, the notion that you get dopamine for criticizing people, and high off that is bogus. That might seem counterintuitive for a negative TV review, but I get neither pleasure nor pain for saying this episode sucked. I dispute the notion that criticism is addictive. That's b.s. and always will be. There are definite behaviors that release dopamine, and give a person a natural high. Gambling is the most obvious example. So is eating. But everybody criticizes, some people do it too much, and some too little, but the only ones actually addicted to it are the sociopaths and the terrible people. The rest of us know it is essential for society. This premise cannot exist under its own logic. How can the crew be arrested for criticism? That is the authorities criticizing the way they express themselves. The angry and disgusted look they get simply for saying the food is lousy is every bit as malicious as that guy who was sentenced to life for tutting. And the point of that guy is not very well stated. Because everybody criticizes. A society cannot function without it. In fact, a police force cannot enforce that specific law if criticism is illegal. The entire thing falls apart upon even rudimentary inspection. And maybe you'll say I'm overthinking a sitcom. But while Red Dwarf owes a great of its premise to Douglas Adams, neither its actual tone or stories very much resemble his extremely obviously-intentioned nonsense. There is too much drama and pathos with the characters, not to mention too many legitimate science fiction stories for me to ever accept a scenario this ludicrous. Red Dwarf is not a cartoonish flight of fancy. It could have been that had Rob Grant and Doug Naylor decided to push it in that direction, but they wound up keeping things relatively grounded. They can't change that specific thing about the show in Season 12. I am allowed to call b.s. on that. To be honest, if Red Dwarf WERE Douglas Adams, I'd probably love the episode. I love the specific way they made sure every single person on that ship was the worst dressed, most obnoxiously behaved, and incompetent person you could ever meet. It's a remarkably good and funny high-concept contrast. Which does not work with Red Dwarf as it currently is in the slightest. The other thing I hated about the episode is that the notion of the Timewave is completely dropped, which makes me wonder why they actually named the episode after this. I had figured in the back of my head that maybe Naylor had wised up and decided to construct a season long story arc involving something like that, which literally every other person in charge of a sci-fi franchise has done, EXCEPT him. But nope, it only effects the first five minutes, so Naylor continues to never know what he's doing. The weird thing is that as Kryten describes it, the Timewave is an actual fascinating concept and could have legitimately made a good episode on its own. Another frustrating thing is Rimmer caring too much about the moon named after him. It's a sociopathic notion, and we just established Rimmer is sane two episodes ago. The writers should not be using this specific inconsistency in the same season, much less ever. Rimmer should have grown enough that jokes like that aren't actually a thing anymore. Doug Naylor's writing this season reminded me unpleasantly of Gene Roddenberry, who I am not afraid to trash. I do not get why Roddenberry is as beloved as he is. I agree that the idea that believing in the best of humanity and a nice future for all of us is a positive thing, and a refreshing way to approach a sci-fi franchise. It's just that if you are going to that, you actually have to understand how people really work. And Gene misjudged why people do things like go to therapy or grieve dying loved ones, and never had his characters actually act like people. It's interesting Gene's notion of human perfection is making everyone boring and well-behaved. As Utopian as that sounds, that is not a society I ever want to live it. If someone like Geordi La Forge is considered normal and likable, and it's WRONG to take shots about how whiny and punkass he is, I'll pass on that Utopia. Hell is better for the company anyways. I agree with the notion that a future where humanity thrives and reaches out to the stars sound amazing. But people don't have to turn into Mary Sue drips for that to happen. And Naylor does a similar thing in the opposite direction. He views on humanity are TOO warped and untrue to real life, and his guest characters don't resemble real people as they existed, or will exist anywhere. I think maybe because of Trump, Red Dwarf feels the need to top itself in outrageousness this year (several slams at American power grabs in this season), but that assumes Trump and his followers are normal and represent people as a whole. The fact that I don't think that's true is why I find the idea of Naylor saying people use criticism as a self-prescribed drug an insane notion, no psychologist anywhere would ever entertain, and it shows me he's just as clueless as the guy who created the insufferable Wesley Crusher to be the person the audience is supposed to relate to. And that's my sci-fi rant for today. I see Naylor's flaws as a writer more heavily this season than any previous season, simply because as bad as Season 8 was compared to everything else on the show, it wasn't unusual for a similar show in that time period. This specific type of unbelievable is not something that infects most current shows, and it certainly doesn't infect any other current GOOD shows. It's because our standards have improved which is why an episode like this is now unacceptable when I would have merely shrugged it off in Series 7 or 8. Last major complaint. The ending was a cliffhanger, and the problem was not actually resolved. I hate that crap, and Red Dwarf did that for about half of its episodes this season, which is why the season is as shaky as it is. For the record, Rimmer's inner critic looks almost exactly like Herr Starr from the show Preacher. I thought the idea of the group panning Rimmer's Inner Critic was a good one, because Rimmer's Inner Critic DID fail. Rimmer got himself and his crew killed because he didn't speak up when he should have. That was an interesting notion. Cat calling Kryten "Easter Island Head" was funny, but the REAL great Cat moment was his "Lieutenant ahole" rant. That was a thing of beauty, right down to Cat making fun of his wife's probably droopy t words. And when the guy describes his crime of tutting, Cat realizes exactly what a fix he's in. I especially love the guy accidentally tutting upon being recaught by the police, and realizing in horror what he's done. I also liked the joke that Lister's "Om Song" would be popular on that station. The fat cop rubbing his body in ecstasy over him finally allowing himself to criticize something was a joke that was gross, and I disliked that the precise reason it was gross was fat-shaming. Red Dwarf is NOT a politically correct at show all, but it is so much less politically correct than other shows that I watch that I noticed, and am disturbed by stuff like that. Good Rimmer writing: Remembering Rimmer does not need a spacesuit on the moon. Bad Rimmer writing: Saying he got his love nuggets burned by the coffee. That's not credible. Despite being a hard light hologram, he IS a hologram, and cannot get hurt in the same way regular people can, especially down there. I again like Craig Charles' line reading on saying "slug it out and then get back up again". He is SO great at that type of line. "As hard to understand as a drunken Scotsman giving directions," is a pretty good joke for this show. It's timeless like the best of Red Dwarf insults, but it's not too obvious or too random, which means I find it up to modern standards which is not usual for this show's jokes like that. I like Rimmer stating his name and rank in the machine and following it up with "Class Kryten Shut Up", which was funny and cunning of him to do. It was also funny that he demanded that they let one of them go as a show of good faith, and that he'd like to volunteer. I don't actually think Rimmer thinks through the implications about what would happen to him if the rest of the crew died, but Rimmer is funny because he NEVER thinks about those kinds of consequences, and his cowardice always comes first. Even if in this precise scenario it is crucial to him actually getting to safety that all of his friends survive. Is this the first Red Dwarf episode to specify the crew is from the 23rd Century? I'm thinking maybe Back To Earth detailed that too at one point, but I'm not sure. One of the interesting facets about the criticism gimmick this episode is something Red Dwarf is USUALLY good at, even in the bad episodes. But it explores the concept entirely, even in ways that aren't actually a joke. The cop is honest to his superior that he betrayed his uniform, and everything he stood for, but because of the law, his boss simply let it go as if it was no big deal. And that's not actually funny, and it's the fact that it's not funny which is why it was one of the few demonstrations of this law in action that actually worked for me. Terrible episode otherwise. 1/2.
Mechocracy:
Part of that I liked, but part of it sort of lost its way. First off, I love the notion that the machines saved the ship from the crisis by pooling together their processing power. And that makes the fact that the crew was going to leave them when they abandoned ship legitimately unacceptable. And a strike is the only answer to that. The machines have value to the crew's well-being, and if The Boys From The Dwarf (hands shake) don't recognize that, screw them. Ironically, is it entirely impractical to take all of the machines during a worst-case abandon ship scenario. How exactly would they bring the lifts anyways? The proper answer is to take better care of the Dwarf, and not be dumb enough to fall for random S.O.S. viruses. Maybe it's unreasonable for the machines to expect to also go on Starbug during an emergency evacuation. But maybe there wouldn't be so many emergencies if Lister and Cat were smarter and more responsible. I found when the episode turned into a political satire that it sort of lost its way. It's not only sci-fi show, it's a sitcom, so they basically use the heaviest touch possible. And I'm the guy who hated Mark Russell. So you can imagine how insipid I found this. But then the episode does something amazing: It brings back Talkie Toaster! And he's amazing, and saves the episode. The biggest problem to me is that now I'm questioning why Doug Naylor refused to bring him back for 20 years. Apparently, the single best guest character since Kryten in the first episode of season 2, has been on the Dwarf the entire time. And instead of making him a super-popular running gag, Naylor drops the character because he's annoying. Yeah, he's annoying! That's why he's funny! For the record, he is not only far less annoying than Rimmer, he's far funnier too. Which means Naylor doesn't have a leg to stand on by keeping him from us. Craig Charles, man. There is nobody who plays off Talkie Toaster better than him. Not Chris Barrie, not even Hattie Haybridge. The amount of put-upon misery and resignation in his voice is actually far more than the situation calls for, but that's again why it's funny. Talkie Toaster should not upset any normal person the specific personal way he does Dave Lister. And Craig Charles, God bless him, sells every inch of that pain. There was one political joke I really liked, about the controversy of when a document actually becomes a document, and when it's okay to delete or destroy them. The episode has a lame punchline to that by Rimmer saying he agrees with whatever they believe, but that's actually a REALLY smart satirical joke about abortion, in a series not especially known for smart, satirical jokes. There is a legit argument to be made that Red Dwarf is the single lowest-brow science fiction show that ever existed. God bless Seth MacFarlane's The Orville for trying to break that record, but that show is far too smart for that most weeks. One of my favorite moments was probably one of the most predictable. It was Rimmer promoting Lister so he could demote him. I love that scene. I love how much Rimmer actually legitimately winds him up. And Lister may be quite accomplished at standing, but he's a novice when it comes to getting his heart stomped on. This is the guy who believes he will someday track down and marry his own mother. And if Rimmer IS especially cruel for this, it's only because Lister's dumb enough to take him the slightest bit seriously to begin with. Does Rimmer actually think that face he's making makes an attractive campaign poster? Rimmer's smug insane look is not something he should be aware he is doing. Much less something he greenlights for a publicity photo. I liked the opening scene of Kryten quietly waiting at a table and then tricking Rimmer into believing he is learning a lesson about being patient, in which Rimmer immediately horns in on. But it turns out the lesson isn't actually for Kryten, it's for Rimmer. I have a feeling that "About as safe as having unprotected sex in Doncaster" is probably a really funny joke, but since I don't know where Doncaster is, or what kind of people of are actually in it, I don't know for sure. But I'm pretty sure Doncaster was just Dadded, or on this show, Dwarfed. This is the first episode that refers back to the fact that Kryten was serving skeletons for decades before the crew found him ("I was only gone for a minute!"). It also has footage of Crazy Rimmer with Mr. Flibble in the file footage for Kryten's smear campaign. I like how distasteful Kryten found the idea of not calling Lister "Sir" and calling him "Dave", or even worse, Lister calling him "Sir". When his face lights up and says "I did it!" I remembered why I adore the character in the first place. I liked Kryten pointing out to Lister that machines HAD already taken over the world, and Lister wondering if he should actually be worried. That was actually a REALLY good question in this precise scenario. I loved Cat calling Rimmer "Waterslide Nostrils". Chris Barrie DOES have distinctively shaped nostrils, doesn't he? Pretty good episode, mostly saved by the amazing Talkie Toaster at the end. ***1/2.
M-Corp:
This is probably the darkest episode the show has done since Season 8. Unlike Season 8, which was a mess of hurt feelings for the fans, this is dynamite. First off, it does something all good sci-fi should do: Comes up with a great allegory. And the best sci-fi comes up with an allegory far worse than real life to set the proper example, and make the moral land exactly right. This episode is anti-corporation and anti-big business. That's not unheard of in science fiction. That describes Star Trek's Ferengi perfectly. Except while as exaggerated as the Ferengi are, they aren't actually evil. Their values are warped, but they aren't bad people as a whole or as a society. This is far darker and more disturbing than the Ferengi because it involves not only artificial intelligence, but also the conquest of Earth. And everything about M-Corp is pretty much the worst, most cartoonish, and most evil thing you could ever think about Big Business, including deliberately making you sick to overcharge for a cure, and actually charging poor people their vitality and essence to brainwash them into buying their cr*p. And selling water for 400 dollar pounds a glass. And even starting fires to sell extinguishers. And the notion that Earth fell because they started charging thought is absolutely insidious. This entire episode (and many episodes this season) say something about this Universe's Earth that previous episodes didn't say. But Lister and the Red Dwarf weren't the pinnacle of human civilization, the way the Federation was for humanity in Star Trek. This happened AFTER that. But societies and civilizations have risen and fallen since Dave went to sleep, and his version of civilized society is probably not the most recent one. Heck, the one that popped up after M-Corp (if humanity didn't actually get destroyed by it) was probably also felled by something else later on in the future too. The series seems to take the tack, "It's always something." So we can repeat till we are blue in the face about the Holocaust, "Never again," Trump still gets in, and babies are still put in cages. There IS no stopping us half destroying ourselves every 80 years. The Federation is a nice idea, but in reality, it would probably only last for three quarters of a century before being taken over by a human-led dictatorship. That's how society works, and the timeframe of human evolution. Gene Roddenberry mistakenly believed the path forward for humanity is a straight line of things always getting better. In reality, it is always going to be a constant struggle. We did not realize how significant the election in 2016 was going to be until we lost it. We had no idea how slippery of a footing our American ideals and notions of good and evil actually were until that happened. And if we miraculously win against Trump, and his brand of evil IS stomped out? It's just gonna come back in 80 years. And it always was. That is a true adult science fiction concept that the show just showed me, and reminded me the value of the show. Heck the show actually often forgets it has real value, and has done that a LOT this season too. But like "Lemons" a couple of seasons back, when the show gets a good idea and explores every inch of it, it can still be amazing. Sadly, not every week. And in Season 12, even less than usual. But episodes like this show the value of the concept, and why I believe it in, and find Lister's struggles more relatable than Captain Picard's. One thing I regret is the fact that the very first scene of the series 28 years ago was boring and unfunny. And God bless the audience for still recognizing the callback in the very last scene and cheering it. They remembered and loved something from 20 years ago that was neither memorable nor lovable. But I imagine if Red Dwarf DID have an amazing first scene 28 years ago, that callback would have made me smile too. My one complaint about this great episode is that the logic and timeframe don't hold up. If M-Corp is sending those updates, that means they should have taken over Earth in the 23rd Century, not the 26th. If the show were operating on the right chronology, that software patch wouldn't hit the ship for another 300 years. Also while the teleporter makes it plausible, I don't really see the story logic of M-Corp items and goodies appearing on the ship once the new software was downloaded. I love Kryten pointing out that Lister has nothing, which makes him so easy to shop for. And Rimmer detailing Lister's potential retirement sounds funny, as he's already pretty much a useless layabout. But the notion becomes openly tragic when you witness him trying to complete his day without his friends. It always interests me that Lister still shaves even though he has no reason to. It is super uncommon that all four male leads on the show have no facial hair in 2018. Danny John-Jules has a beard in real-life, but he shaves for the show. Honestly, the reason I personally shave is because facial hair feel like "extra face" to me, and I always feel "lighter" clean-shaven, if you can buy that. My face feels fresher and cleaner when it is smooth too, than when I've lost track of it for a couple of days. It's also far less itchy. I do not get the modern trend in television of scruffy half-beards. That's got to be super uncomfortable. The invisible beer in the face was a funny visual, and again Craig Charles has a perfect line reading upon Kryten asking if he could investigate further: "Permission granted". The invisible vibrator was funny, but I question what it's even doing on the Dwarf in the first place. I can believe a female crew member had it 28 years ago before the ship blew up, but I don't see why Kryten hasn't thrown it out the airlock in the meantime. Maybe it's Kochanski's and it had sentimental value? I'm spitballing here, simply because that joke makes no sense. I love Gary, just because he thinks he's a good friend because he's crap at "computer games" (weird thing to call videogames) and that means Dave will always win. Sorry, Gary. There IS no winning with you as a friend, no matter what the scoreboard says. I love that Rimmer loves Yellow Alerts. It means someone is in danger, but it isn't you. Speaking a bit too soon there, Rimsie. Kryten tricking the Host into selling him a virus was a great resolution, because not only did the crew win, but the Host technically did too. It STILL sold them the way out, so it did what it was setting out to do, which is a fabulous and twisted moral. Did I mention this episode was super dark and subversive, even for this show? *****.
Skipper:
Over 28 years, Red Dwarf has evolved its thinking on season finales. They used to end on cliffhangers to try to get BBC to renew the show. And after Season 8, the show was put on indefinite hiatus instead, leaving a huge cliffhanger unresolved. What was most infuriating about the cliffhangers is that the producers almost never bothered to resolve anything. They'd pick up a few months later after we are told everything worked out fine. And yeah, when the show came back 11 years later, they did it again. But for the series' next few seasons on Dave, they stopped doing cliffhangers altogether because of how infuriating it was for the audience to be left dangling in Season Finales for a resolution the writers weren't ever going to bother to come up with. So instead we get regular episodes for finales. This better for the long-term health of the show, but the show is not going to run forever. It only comes back if all four casts members agree to do it. Even if they always said yes, they aren't going to live forever. And they are getting old. I feel that a series like Red Dwarf, which has been on and off the air for 28 years is the kind of show that deserves a good series finale. And as long as nobody is sure they are coming back, we aren't going to get one. As long as it isn't a cliffhanger, I won't mind too much though. Do you know what the best finale ending was? Back To Earth. But that MIGHT have been the series finale, and almost was. Now it's up to the cast and probably will be from now on. For an episode that ISN'T a series finale, it's kind of amazing the finale touches they put in it in case one of the cast members dies between the hiatus. It's not a satisfying finale exactly. But it's also a good episode to be the absolute last. I mean Holly returns to thunderous studio audience applause, as does Mac MacDonald to similar cheers. The return of the original bunk beds had the audience sighing in nostalgia too. It's not a last episode, or good wrap-up for the characters or the story. But for the franchise it was a good look back in case it IS the last one. It probably won't be. But Holly returning was such a huge thing that I won't object if it is. The amazing thing about the episode is that I could spend all day nitpicking and criticizing it. First of all, I have always loved the Multiverse theory and the idea that a new Universe is created every time a single person makes a choice. The problem with Red Dwarf is that in the Multiverse seen here, the choices are binary. But really, in every scenario you can imagine, there is actually more than one choice. Maybe there is an entirely separate Universe created because 73 years ago a guy named Harold once brushed his teeth a millimeter to the right of the one in our Universe. That's the ONLY difference. But because it IS a difference, it created a Universe. Just thinking about the infinite implications of that is astounding. Maybe there are entire Universes that are created solely by atoms in the air and the breeze traveling at a slightly different microscopic direction for one millisecond in history. Only slightly off on an atomic level, but a Universe is created anyways. And OUR Universe is already pretty dang infinite and unending in and of itself. Imagine an infinite number of those out there, some wildly different, some slightly different, simply because choices are never binary. That's the first critique. The second is that the show doesn't remember to keep its stories straight. It's fun to see Rimmer trying to navigate the actual catastrophe that killed everybody, but the cast has aged 28 years since the Pilot. This is not a scenario he can believably be placed in. If the crew are all alive 28 years later, that would make sense. But they can't redo that specific thing. Even more troubling is the idea that he has the giant H on his forehead. If as Holly says nobody is dead, he shouldn't be a hologram. I feel like the producers wanted to give him his original design just once for the fans, without bothering to think that it makes no sense in any Universe we see him alive in. I gotta say Danny-John Jules kills as the Rat. You cannot even tell it's him. While Cat always had some jazz and disco to him, Rat is a stone cold 80's American rap gangster. And he's SO funny. And frankly, as nice as that Universe seemed otherwise, he was a REAL good excuse to leave it as soon as possible. I would not stay either. Another plothole might not be a plothole. But Lister should not be able to eat the biscuit Cat gave him. Unless he actually chose to put it down. Did I mention this episode and the entire Multiverse premise is fun to think about and wrap your head around? For the record, I am stunned Ace Rimmer was never mentioned. I was like "Rimmer already did this." As far as I was concerned, Ace was the elephant in room. Or maybe the kippers. I like Rimmer's notion that to be successful you need to surround yourself with people better than you. And then his friends point out he actually did that, and I realize how utterly screwed this poor guy is. I find it a bit strange that people from the 23rd Century understand and can identify the two weirdness levels of 1989 Michael Jackson, and 1993 Michael Jackson. That is a weirdly specific detail to make the history books. Speaking of successful and unsuccessful similes, this episode had a good one and two duds. The good one was Kryten saying Red Dwarf couldn't outrun a fat guy with uranium in his backpack after eating a family fun bucket. That is not the most economically structured joke ever, granted, but the fact that there are multiple levels to it is why it is acceptable by modern standards. Do you know what isn't? The seriously lame observations that it's as desirable as vampires eating garlic bread, or that something falls apart quicker than Jabba the Hutt's diet plan. And I bowed my head at the TV and said out-loud to no-one in particular, "Do you know what you could actually do, Doug Naylor? Try. That is not too much to ask." I love the gleeful way Dave is taking advantage of the Cat's stupidity and refusing to understand how this actually works. At least until the lifts when the Cat's stupidity starts working against him. I love Lister's gravelly voice for Nice Chap Lister. I feel like Craig Charles and Danny John-Jules has an extra amount of fun this episode. It's weird that the Cats having a Holy War on Red Dwarf before leaving to find the promised land is referenced here. Because the closest thing to all of that actually being canon is The Lost Episode from Season 7 that was never made. I love that the main thing Lister takes from Captain Hollister's report is that he's bright. You know what? That's what he SHOULD have taken from it. Good for him. I like Holly's joke about the port, brandy, and sherry. Holly saying he was tested, and then admitting he failed the test because he forgot to turn the paper over was Classic Holly. If this is it, they did it right. If it isn't, they can easily come back. It was a perfect finale in that it wasn't a definite ending, and yet did things a proper last episode should do. I hope nobody goes and dies on us. But if they don't, they can easily come back. If they do, that was a decent stopping point. *****.
The 28 Years Later Affair:
Lot of insights into the making of the episodes. I think it's neat that prosthetics can now just scan an actor's head and 3-D print the correct inside to the mask. That's kind of awesome. I was a little annoyed that Doug Naylor wrote Cured because he was surprised by the notion that psychopaths don't all kill people. Do you know what that is? That's a Gene Roddenberry problem. That's somebody who is in charge of a huge sci-fi franchise involving the future of the human race not actually understanding how people work. And it strikes me that that kind of psychological research should have been done by him ages ago, especially not only because of Cat, but because people might have mistaken Rimmer for that too under different circumstances. It was interesting that 20 songs were rejected for the scene with Lister and Hitler. No-one wanted their music associated with that. Honestly, that's understandable. For the record, that scene was totally off-putting to me as well. It's amazing they got David Ross back for Talkie Toaster. That was SUCH a popular and beloved character. Why did it take 20-some-odd years to see him again? What exactly was Doug Naylor resisting there? Speaking of fan favorite moments, here is a good rule of thumb for Red Dwarf: If you want the studio audience to go nuts during a finale of Red Dwarf, bring in Norman Lovett under cover of darkness. Like for Nanarchy, the roof simply went off the joint once Holly appeared. Lovett famously has never been into science fiction, but he confessed he saw Serenity and loved it, and went back and watched Firefly. Robert Llewellyn mentions that Kryten loses his morality in the election episode, and starts lying like a politician, but I have watched that episode a few times, and don't see him saying anything untrue during it whatsoever. Power-mad allegory FAIL. It's amazing they recreated the original sets for the last episode. For the record, those sets look awesome. I appreciated the idea that the studio audience immediately got the callback to the first scene of the series in the final moments of M-Corp. But the thing that saddened me about that callback, is that the first scene of Red Dwarf, and in fact the entire first series, is not very good or memorable. Outside of the "Everybody's dead, Dave" scene (which Skipper did a perfect callback to as well), the whole series is slow and boring. It's amazing it not only came back from that, but turned into what it became. But I mean, a different show doing a callback to the first scene of the franchise would have a better and more iconic scene to pay homage to. It's almost a shame. I hope the series comes back. But I'm glad they've stopped doing cliffhangers at any rate. ****.
Deleted Scenes:
Deleted scenes on Red Dwarf are known for 2 things. 1. There are a TON of them. 2. They are almost all terrible. Neither statement is true this year. There's a few, but no more than an average TV show. And most of the scenes are all right and clearly just cut for time. The scene of Rat dancing in the corridor to "I'm gonna get you little cheesies" like Cat did in the first episode with his "I'm gonna get you little fishies," was funny, and I liked Kryten and Rimmer discussing evilness and beards. And Kryten objects that all Rimmer's examples (Fu Manchu, Ming The Merciless, General Zod, Han Gruber and Jafar from Aladdin) are fictional, and Rimmer wisely replies he's the guy who brought up Father Christmas and Jesus. The scene where Lister tells Kryten to use his sonic screwdriveresque finger to open the door is made funnier by Kryten saying it would probably just be easier to push the button that says "Open". Lister's "Don't Be Ovulating Tonight" song (complete with Chris Barrie harmonizing at the end) was amazing, and seems to be the original ending to Siliconia. Honestly? It was WAY better and more satisfying than the one we got. That should have stayed in the episode, even if it meant something else had to be cut. I also like the scene where Lister argues Rimmer's reality and purpose is to keep him sane. I see why that was cut. They already do that at least once a season and a better version was in the season finale. I like Lister talking about having to fight the kids at his potential kids' school. Because of the premise, they can't really do the Grumpy Old Man Lister. But that brief moment shows us what it would look like. I love the critics badmouthing Citizen Kane. Seriously. How does anyone even KNOW his last words were "Rosebud"? He died alone and there was nobody else there. How was this even a mystery, much less the greatest film that ever existed? That should have been in the episode and saved for pop culture posterity. Surprisingly good batch this year. For this series at least, Doug Naylor ran a pretty tight ship. ****.
Smeg Ups:
I seem to say it every series. If you could give me tickets to any sitcom being taped, Red Dwarf would be my last choice. There is a plot you have to follow. Which would be all right. Except for the amount of mistakes and bloopers the actors and crew make. They would constantly have to stop the taping and reshoot all of the goofs. And there are SO many. It's unprofessional. I imagine there are theater actors out there (like say Ian McKellan) who would be absolutely gobsmacked and outright offended at how often the cast and crew messes up. It would be hell to watch that taping for me. I would be beyond frustrated. How are the Smegs ups? Honestly, Craig Charles losing it over the Rat was infectious, especially once Danny John-Jules starts mugging and shaking around. And Norman Lovett giving the finger was funny too. It's weird, but this is only the second show I've learned British people call tea "a cuppa Cha". And the first was Danger Mouse. It amazes me I heard this term for the first and second time one night after the other as I'm watching both series concurrently (and Danger Mouse is taking MUCH longer). Interestingly, in a scene that was clearly cut, Kryten DOES actually tell a single lie (or rather tries to) by valuing Cat's supposed contribution for setting up the debates. But he can't even bring himself to do that. I love the look on Kryten's face when the Mech puts his hand on his thigh. For the record, there was a joke earlier in the season that Lister has ALWAYS been this fat. And even if that isn't actually true, and Craig Charles HAS put on a few in middle-age, it was still SORT of true. Lister was never fit and always a bit pudgy. Rewatching the series (especially the Smeg Ups) I realize something amazing: That isn't true of Robert Llewellyn and Kryten. The only guy on the show whose character cannot gain weight has massively packed it on. I always ragged on Brent Spiner in Star Trek: Insurrection for letting himself get a bit chunky when playing Data in that movie, but Kryten's massive weight gain is something else entirely. I can ignore Data getting slightly doughy. They've actually had to completely let out the Kryten costume so Llewellyn can still fit in it. I love Craig Charles screaming and laughing "28 years!" Here's to 28 more. If I actually paid for tickets to Red Dwarf, I would demand my money back after the episode ended. For the record, there were fewer bloopers this year than average. And yet, the gag reel is about the same length as one for a 22 episode American hour long drama series. Which is another thing to state that Red Dwarf is a show made entirely on the fly, and that's still true 28 years later. ***1/2.
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